That’s almost 3 months of digital silence worth nothing and I’m missing you all (miss-ING because i miss you all, all the time anyway). oh well i could be slightly out of touch but I’m hoping that the way i touched you in all sorts of ways lasted all the way from 08. you probably felt me brush your shoulder or come across your busy mind once in a while for the stories we shared – i hope you do remember me for the write reasons.

by the way, id like to greet everyone a belated merry Christmas and a happy new year. i still have my Christmas wish list hanging on my sub-conscious, so for anybody who might want to do something good and share something wonderful, late is just a state of mind and any day is a perfect day to make somebody happy. =P

I stumbled upon a Buddha quote on late night TV last week:

“There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way, and not starting.”

for all the good reasons i could probably muster, this one got me to force myself to write something new after almost three months. for about sometime, i loathed the pen and paper approach for a few earthly excuses – a combination of eccentric swerves, some moments of yearning for emotional silence, and a whole lot of nothingness.

and so now that im over it, i reckon it’s all in the mind, and in the hands too! those days, nothing seems to be right in my left hand (this one’s classic =P)… and in my write hand, i can’t get some sort of a lift (i hope this one makes sense… ).

i seem to wonder – whatever happened to the words inside my head, the fancy stories i made up, and the love I wanted to share? i really don’t know… probably drowned in a pool of alcohol, or something else gooey. It’s just like a game of cards really, and i haven’t been up to the idea of playing my hand well. it was something like, somebody dealt me the king and queen of hearts, which was at least a good idea. I’m not so sure if i wanted to call it, or give it up, but raising the whole point up was a good idea nonetheless; wishing that it wouldn’t turn out to be just a flop.

i hope you got that one – I’m a big-game-gambler by nature, occasionally playing against the big guns like love and luck.

and so i realized that even if I’m a jack(ass) and you’re a queen if we were dealt together, we’d still make a good pair.

A week into the new year and I’m still not feeling the vibe anyhow. I’ve been expecting an upbeat first few days but it looks like the universe has some other plans. it was nostalgic though, to say the least, even more nostalgic now that ive seen everything to be just the same. the year changed but some things just refuse to evolve  with it. and although i promised myself myself to start acting on some improvements and changes, there’s that rule that just wouldn’t change – id still make promises id end up breaking.

Anyway, on the other side of the golden coin, I’m still your upbeat neighbor willing to go through a lot of things just to get noticed. You’re such a hot neighbor i should start loving thy neighbor as i love chocolate.

And that love goes for every single one of you. take note, “single”…

• • •

bola-bola

Everyone, I’d like you to meet bola-bola, the cat in my hat, or head… whatever. You could read more of her in here.

By the way, she’s not hindu. That red mark is her siopao destiny showing..